


Fake ID

by 264feet



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Drabble, F/F, Fluff, Rated T for Miu, Trans Female Character
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:15:03
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,014
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26564968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/264feet/pseuds/264feet
Summary: Kaede gets turned away from a club for supposedly having a fake ID. Miu's is actually fake, but that's not her fault.
Relationships: Akamatsu Kaede/Iruma Miu
Comments: 4
Kudos: 73





	Fake ID

**Author's Note:**

> Based on a prompt from https://prompts.neocities.org/ which I rubbed my trans wlw loving hands on and thus modified: "Kaede gets busted at a club for giving a fake ID. Miu behind them is sweating bullets because they were going to try the same thing and casually get out of line and start a conversation with Kaede."

Miu gets in line outside the club just in time to hear the bouncer calling out some poor sap. The beefcake narrows his eyes at the girl in front of him. “Is this a joke?”

“What’s wrong with it?” the girl asks. She’s a blonde, and a pretty one. Not as beautiful as Miu herself, of course. Strange that the bouncer is giving her a hard time; usually the pretty ones can go right in.

“This isn’t your ID, ma’am. Was there a mistake?” 

“No, this is my ID. It’s… old,” the girl says. “See? You can tell it’s me. The same bit of hair sticks up.” 

The bouncer looks unconvinced. “Look, the person in the photo is a boy and the given name is obviously masculine. This isn’t your ID. Did you borrow your older brother’s ID because you didn’t think I would pay attention?”

“It really is mine!” The girl puts her hands on her hips as if she’s about to go toe-to-toe with muscles-for-brains here. She reminds Miu of herself! “I just… ugh. Whatever.” 

The bouncer returns the supposedly fake ID. Several others enter the club with no problem. Miu pulls out her legal ID and gives it a once-over. Everything’s legit. Name: Egg McMuffin. Picture: Kokichi giving her the middle finger. Height: 420 cm. 

Oh.

She is going to _strangle_ that little purple gremlin. 

The bouncer holds out his hand to check her ID and she just walks past him down the sidewalk, away from the club. It was probably dull in there, anyway-- would have bored girl genius Miu Iruma to tears. There’s more interesting subjects out tonight. 

It takes a bit of running, but she catches up to the blonde girl who was turned away. “Yo! You got a fake ID too?!”

She turns, clearly surprised someone followed her. She relaxes a bit seeing it’s a girl and not some creepy guy. “Mine is real. It’s just… complicated.” 

“Hey, sugar tits, the bouncer’s out of earshot. You can level with me.” Miu says. “I’ve been kicked out of more clubs than you can count. Those limp-dicked losers couldn’t handle me. Testing out my t-shirt cannon that fires condoms probably didn’t help, but fuck ‘em if they don’t like progress.” 

The girl laughs. It’s a nice sound-- light and airy. Miu usually would have punted someone mocking her inventions by now, but something about this girl is different. 

“Um… no, no,” she says, starting to catch her breath. She wipes a tear of mirth from her eye. “My ID is real.”

This again? Talk about a party pooper. Miu Iruma’s expert analysis indicates she’s her age, so probably legally able to enter clubs. “What is it then? Does it say ‘ban this bitch’ on your ID or something?” 

“Might as well. I’m transgender.” She keeps walking, but her fists ball by her sides. It’s a big revelation, but the girl takes it in stride. “My preferred name is Kaede, but… the ID has my old name on it, as well as a picture of how I looked back then. I thought I didn’t look that masculine, so people usually don’t care, but…” 

For once, the great girl genius Miu Iruma has pause. She would have never suspected. Sure, Kaede’s looks don’t stand up to Miu’s, but who _can_ compare? Her knee-jerk reaction is to make fun of her, as she so often does. Show dominance before you can be mocked. Laugh at what you don’t understand. 

Something holds her back. Maybe it’s the fact that she can tell Kaede wouldn’t take her shit. She stood up to a guy who was two heads taller than her. Or maybe it’s something else. 

Just what that ‘something else’ is scares her. 

“I’m sorry. That sucks donkey ass,” Miu says, sympathetically. “Who gives a flyin’ fuck about the past? I might’ve been a lil girl without this gorgeous rack years n’ years ago, but just look at me now! And look at you! The only thing that bitch bouncer was ‘bouncing’ were his chances of ever suckin’ a titty besides his mama’s.” 

“Thanks?” Kaede says, laughing again. A surge of pride swells in Miu’s chest. “I appreciate you trying to make me feel better. I’m kind of used to this, though.” She shrugs in a way that makes Miu want to sprint home and invent a robot that instantly punches transphobes in the face. “Those places never play my kind of music, anyway… I prefer piano. I guess I wanted to go because I was lonely.” 

Kaede turns to Miu and smiles. “But I met someone nice without going in, so it all worked out!” 

Miu almost looks around to see who she’s talking about before realizing it’s her. “Damn right, you got fuckin’ lucky! You met Miu Iruma, the gorgeous girl genius with the golden brain!” 

“Oh, is that so?” A wry smile curls on her lips. “You’re definitely a chord off from others. The great inventor of the condom gun, right?”

“That was a great idea!” Miu snaps. “It’s protection, fast! And you can hit people with ‘em! Offense and defense!” 

“Wouldn’t it be more practical if it fired the condom directly onto the penis?” 

Finally, someone who gets it. Well, there’s at least a 50% chance that Kaede is mocking her, but at least she’s listening. Kokichi would have shut her down and called her something stupid by now. 

“Not a bad idea, for an amateur. It could work for the second version of it,” Miu says. “I’d need a test subject.” 

Kaede rolls her eyes. “At least buy me a drink first.” 

“Drinks? Us? With what fuckin’ ID?” Miu holds up the one that Kokichi oh-so-generously gave her. Kaede laughs again. 

It’s… nice. Not being laughed at. Being able to talk to someone. She takes a chance. Miu grips Kaede’s hand as they cross an intersection. She doesn’t let go once they’re past. 

Neither does Kaede, though. 

“I guess we’ll just have to settle for what we have at home,” Kaede says. “My place?” 

“H-hell yeah! Lead on!” 

**Author's Note:**

> If you like my writing, please support me.
> 
> https://officiallilith.tumblr.com/post/174676670574/  
> 


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